macintush:

"It’s pronounced like jif"

Yeah well I don’t gif a fuck

gayinsect:

im pretty sure bromance is the perfect example of how embarrassingly fragile masculinity is. you know what a female bromance is called? a friendship 

  • waitress: i'm sorry we're all out of mozzarella sticks
  • waitress: sir please stop cyring

even tho im beautiful i still get self conches sometimes :/

(Source: melongorl)

allmymetaphors:

i accidentally showed some weakness earlier today it was disgusting i would not recommend it 

buttermilkqueen:

dont u dare treat ur animals like shit in front of me i will end ur life son

(Source: beeblejuice)